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Floppy relationship triangles are essentially unstable and the outcomes are not only unpredictable, but often dire.
There are many factors that can affect these triangulated relationships, and how they are combined can affect the outcome in different ways.
Triangles are stable when all three legs are connected.
What that means in a three-way relationship is that each day is securely connected.
A man in grief, angry, unhinged, or feeling newly free of cumulative stress can be a vulnerable target for an outside person, or even an unthinking seeker of temporary escape.
People in unstable situations often make in-the-moment decisions that have nothing to do with what they may need or want as time elapses.
Over time, and especially if they’ve been in disappointing other relationships, they miss each other again and valiantly try to “make it work.” If they don’t see those patterns and correct them, that process will occur until they either wear each other out or find someone they’d rather invest in.
After a time apart, they realize that they want to make the relationship work and are highly motivated to make that happen.
A newly separated partner is often searching for validation and support and cannot see beyond those needs.
If, on the other hand, a couple has been separated for quite a while, have made multiple attempts to reconnect and failed, the partners may have come to the conclusion that divorce is inevitable.
Those drifts can come from so many causes: illness, financial strain, too many obligations without reward, personal insecurities, stages in life that produce self-doubt, boredom, neglect, too much hostility without reparation, or just plain growing apart.
Relationships that are new have not had the time for enough negatives to accrue that can outweigh the reasons to stay together.
Many people considering divorce are in the throes of conflict and don’t want another source of trouble adding to what is already a difficult situation.