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In stopping dating, I resolved to never feel that way again. I have fantastic friends, whom I would be miserable without, who constantly remind me how lucky I am to be young and only responsible for myself.So why should I waste this important period of my life trying to be responsible for someone else?If you’re in the dating scene, chances are you’ve had an encounter with a man who avoids relationships. the “never married” type, or the guy who seems like he’s into the relationship for the first few dates and then disappears as soon as things get close. Over time, we learn whether our needs will be met with warmth and consistency, with a negative emotion like anger or irritation, or with inconsistent responses. As this cycle of expressing and responding to our needs is repeated thousands of times in those first few years of life, we make powerful connections in our brains that tell us what relationships mean to us. flash forward to adulthood and our question of why some men (and women) avoid relationships.
The hard wiring of the brain can be so powerful in these responses, that it can even override the goals of a man who has a goal to remain in a relationship.For them, independence and emotional distance trump intimacy and vulnerability.Having this style of attachment does not mean that a man is doomed when it comes to relationships, or that he is an insensitive, unloving human being.I have an excellent education and a stimulating internship.I have a loving family and two wonderfully ugly cats.
This attachment system is meant to keep the human species alive.